Monday, 5 November 2012

Wing Night

I'm amazed at the extreme cases of manners, or lack thereof, that I witness every single shift working at the bar. I was serving a younger couple this week on a wing night and when I went by to grab the finished baskets off their table they said something that totally shocked me.

"Sorry, I hope it's okay, we just piled our napkins between our plates here. We just didn't want you to have to touch our used napkins!"


There are people out there who understand how gross it is for servers to pick up your slobbery, wing saucy, torn up napkins?!

The manners that this young couple had is an amazing and extremely rare thing on wing nights.

So just to clarify for people that may not know what is an acceptable level of manners to maintain while gobbling down your deep fried wing deliciousness here's a list of guidelines to follow:

1. Use the plates
Remember how a couple minutes before your wings showed up I gave you plates? That wasn't just      for shits and giggles. They have a purpose. You're supposed to put your bones on them so I don't have to pick up your chewed on bones from the floor, and the table. OHHHH. 

2. Whatever you touch with your saucy fingers, I touch an hour later.
You have full access to wetnaps and napkins. There is no reason why your beer mug should lose its transparency five wings in. It was see-through when i dropped it off, it shouldn't be brown when I pick it up.

3. Be Patient
No, sometimes your wings won't come in ten minutes. There are 15 people at your table, all ordering two baskets, and we're clearly full and on a wait. Do you think we have 30 deep friers in the kitchen?! WAIT. CHILL OUT. THEY WILL COME.

4. If you wouldn't do it to your mother, don't do it to me.
Don't command me, ask me. I am not a slave.
Why did you leave pieces of wings and onion loaf on the chair, table, floor, in your water glass, in the wetnap container, lining the salt shaker, on the window ledge, and inbetween the booth and the wall?
Why did you take the ice out of your glass and watch it half melt on the table? That was very weird and inconsiderate.
If you are over 8 years old you cannot get away with making concoctions of pepsi, bbq sauce, salt and pepper in your glass. Hell, you can't get away with that even under 8. It's never cute.
Have you ever yelled at your mother for not giving birth to you a year earlier? Then don't yell at me for it! You're 17! Leave the lounge! I'm not the law!

And I've said it before, but I'll say it again, Don't you EVER snap your fingers at me.

1 comment:

  1. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha.

    I'm sorry this comment doesn't have more fulfilling content to start a conversation with, but it's the best way I could express my reaction to this amazing conglomerate of a post.